All-Weather Option: Stamford Museum and Nature Center

I love the SMNC! It's one of the few easy things to do with young kids in Stamford. You don't need to plan ahead like if you register for a class, and there is always something to see. (Namely, many types of animals.)

I actually love the SMNC in bad weather. When my sister and her kids were here last February, we had a cold but great outing. The maple sugar shack was already up and rolling, and we had the it almost to ourselves. Going to SMNC in winter is even easy with an infant- just wear them to keep them warm against your body. (I love *babywearing in winter!)

My husband and I took the kid to SMNC on a rainy Saturday morning this November, and we DID have the place to ourselves. "Are you sure it's open?" the husband kept asking, even after we had driven in and parked. "Look, the gate's closed!"
"That's to keep the turkeys in! It's always closed!" I said. "You just open it and walk through!" (He was hoping it was closed because he didn't want to walk around in the drizzle.) I wore the kid, even though he's getting heavy, and we stayed dry under an umbrella. If you are feeling restless, SMNC is a great place to walk around at any time of year.

*Babywearing Tangent (Don't read if you don't care):

This is me babywearing last year. Babywearing in winter is awesome. With the kid against you, you don't have to worry about if he/she is warm or not. You just know, because they're the same temp you are, so you adjust your layers around the kid accordingly. Recently, my sister got me a fancy babywearing vest, so I no longer look like a babywearing hobo with mismatched clothes. (No offense, hobos.)

And this is me babywearing this year, in my fancy new babywearing vest! Marie Claire rated the Peekaru vest as one of their "41 Gifts We Don't Want" but I'd say that writer is misinformed. (With a little research, she's have known that the grey size medium quickly sells out at Metro Minis on the Upper East Side.) I, despite being a babywearing fanatic, also used to think the Peekaru was probably not that useful... until my sister got it for me last month and I was in its cozy heaven of cuteness!!!

If you've babyworn, you know how much easier it is to navigate a crowded place without a stroller. Packed tourist destinations, escalators, stairs, no problem. It's also safer to have them higher up. Last month I had the kid in the stroller in the city- and someone ASHED ON HIS HEAD!!! I promptly put him right into our ERGObaby carrier and wore him for the rest of the night, navigating Times Square and Toys R Us without fear of some idiot dropping a cigarette on him or knocking him in the face with shopping bags.

My city-dwelling sister ordered me the Peekaru the next day, and I wore it the next time I went to see her. We got stared at admiringly all day. I'm serious. No one could resist our adorableness. I felt like a walking ad for the Peekaru.

(Yes, I'm wearing him while pushing a stroller in that photo! I've had hip problems ever since I had him, so if I'm walking 60-70 blocks like I did that day, I bring the stroller in case my hips get tired or sore.)

So, Marie Claire, thank you for bringing the Peekaru to the attention of thousands of people, even if it was to mock it due to your severe ignorance. If even one person discovers the Peekaru from your article, I'm delighted.

Swine Flu Freaking Me Out

I am freaking out about swine flu.

I was already freaking out last week after a friend told me her friend's 5 year old was hospitalized in TX with kidney failure from H1N1. This was a previously healthy kid.
THEN I got an email from a friend in VA yesterday. Her coworker's kid went to a birthday party 2 weeks ago at an elementary school. Every kid at the party came down with the swine flu, and the birthday boy died. Again, a previously healthy kid. Correction: article says the boy had a pre-existing heart condition. Still.

My friend Meg of Fairfield County Child has a post up about where to get the swine flu vaccine (summary: good luck, places have it totally randomly, like the Darien Y has it today, I think the nose spray version). Some pediatricians have the nose spray available, I think, for ages 2-4. Mine doesn't, though. It's a crapshoot, pretty much.

I am definitely getting the swine flu shot or spray for myself. I am leaning toward getting it for my baby, too. I cannot imagine the effects of the vaccine could be worse than the actual swine flu and its accompanying complications. For goodness' sake, the kid ended up in the ER (twice) when we got the flu in CA, and I don't think that was even swine flu. Or maybe it was. But he never had a fever. But they say if you had flu this year, 95% chance it was swine. So maybe we did. That flu we got was certainly frighteningly contagious, which swine supposedly is.

I suppose if I were going to stay home with the baby all winter, and forego playdates and baby classes until flu season is over, I might feel OK about not getting him vaccinated. But one, I don't want to be a total hermit, and two, I'm going to be teaching in January, and he's going to be in daycare, so both he and I will be around a lot of germs. Sigh. I hate to submit my kid to untested vaccines, but this vaccine is made the same way all the other flu vaccines are.

My question is, why WOULDN'T I vaccinate him for swine flu? I'm getting him all the other standard vaccines, including regular flu, so why wouldn't I do one more? He's far more likely to come into contact with swine flu than polio or hepatitis B.

I do see how it seems crazy to give little kids so many vaccines, especially in the first year. I mean, it sucks either way, whether I do it or not.

Good luck to all of you, especially parents, in making your decisions.

Baby-Friendly Rye, and Friendly People

I don't think I'm THAT appealing-looking that I deserved all the friendly attention I got in Rye, NY last week. Therefore, I declare Rye a friendly place. It's friendly to babies and to people who have babies. Let me explain.

Baby-friendly criteria:
1. Easy park and walk.
2. Restos with room for strolles.
3. Restos who don't act like you are crazy for wanting to bring your baby out to dinner.
4. Dessert place within walking distance of a dinner place.
Baby Q and I met up with a friend who was in town from Philly for business. We had a wonderful dinner at Rye Bar and Grill. There was plenty of room for the stroller, and no one looked perturbed when I had to stand up halfway through the meal to rock Q to sleep in his ERGObaby carrier. (Success!) The chopped Cobb salad was super easy to eat while wearing a baby, and darn if that pinot grigio wasn't nice and cold.
After dinner, friendly locals pointed us to Longford's ice cream. The place was pretty small, so my friend went in to get us cones while I sat down with Baby Q outside.

Here comes the friendly to adults part.

"Did you get to eat your dinner?"
"Did you get to eat your dinner?"
I realized the woman beside me was actually talking to me. A stranger- was talking- to me. In- a friendly- way. (Huh? I didn't think that happened up here.)
Me: "Oh, sorry! Yes!"
Woman: "We saw you at dinner!"
Me: "Oh, that's right, duh! Yeah, he finally fell asleep. After I dropped some arugula in his mouth by accident."
The woman, her friend and I had a chuckle, then they left with their band of older children.

"Do you love that stroller?" Now, a lady on the other side of the store's door is calling over to me.
Me: "Enh, it's OK." I realize she has the same stroller. "Oh- why do you love it?"
We then discuss the stroller, I ask how old her baby girl (turns out to be a boy) is, I compliment her excellent post-baby figure, she comes over to tell me how cute Q is, then she remarks how convenient breastfeeding is (I had gotten out my nursing cover), and after she walks away, I wish I lived in Rye so I could befriend her, because she seems really awesome.

Rye was the first town I lived in when I moved up here. I had a nice year, and near the end of the year, met my fabulous friends Wendy and Christopher, who now run a media empire in Fargo ND. A good friend from my birth class lives in Rye. I kind of want to live in Rye, although I bet housing prices are significantly higher than Stamford! But my, that is a walking-friendly, baby-friendly, friendly town.

I can't believe OTHER people were friendly to me. I have stopped being friendly to strangers, because this area has beaten that out of me. Maybe I need to consider changing my ways and become friendly to strangers again. I'll think about it.

Holla to Baby-Friendly Barcelona Stamford

We hit Barcelona Stamford last night with the baby in the stroller and were very pleased with the service. When we walked in the door, the staff didn't act like we were huge pains in the asses for wanting to take baby out to dinner, stroller and all. Several people conferred over where we'd be best, and they gave us a prime outdoor seat. Much appreciated. My baby, of course, was an angel, and we had a great dinner. There was another baby outdoors, and a couple kids inside, and all were civilized as far as I could tell. This was around 6pm.

Among the tapas, I highly recommend the empanadas (get a couple of helpings- and ps they are delightfully spicy) and the smoky eggplant dip. And the free bread: delicious!

Other tapas:
The potato tortilla: not tantalizing.
Chorizo with figs: enh. Figs a bit dry.
Garlic bulb: I did not partake.
My sangria: could have been stronger...

but overall, this could be one of our eating-out-with-baby standbys, because I love the empanadas, and the staff and outdoor seating are quite pleasant. It's not cheap, but it's not crazy either- I think we spent about $23/person for a medium-small amount of food. The bread definitely made it a meal.

On Leaving Babies in Cars (For a "Quick Errand")

I'm not talking about the accidental forgetting of children in cars (see terrifying Washington Post article). I'm talking about, if I am picking up food at Layla's Falafel that I know is ready, and the baby is asleep in his carseat, can I just leave him there for three minutes, rather than haul him out and me have to fend off people who are going to get all up in his face to try to get a peek?
I am so paranoid about my baby that I wouldn't leave him in the car, but I believe people do this quite commonly. A couple months ago on Greenwich Ave, a woman left her 4 week old in the car to do an errand at a bank. When she came out, someone had called 911 (which you HAVE to do, because you don't know if the person forgot their kid or not) and the cops were already there. She said she could see the car the whole time, but they arrested her.

When is it OK to leave a kid in the car for just a few minutes? I doubt the law says, "Parents may leave a child in a car as long as they can see it from the window of the store, and as long as their errand does not take longer than ten minutes."
My husband says, When the kid is old enough to let himself out in an emergency, it's OK. I don't agree. I think they need to be like, 11. Or as old as it takes for them to have common sense not to break something in the car, or let a stranger steal them, or to accidentally put the car in drive.
I suppose the situation falls under the area of neglect and endangerment, but that's pretty subjective. I want to know, can you leave your baby in the car or not? Or, like most things, is it OK as long as you don't get caught?

OK, I found the law:
"An act concerning the penalty for leaving a child unsupervised in a place of public accommodation or motor vehicle.
(a) Any parent, guardian or person having custody or control, or providing supervision, of any child under the age of twelve years knowingly leaves such child unsupervised in a place for a period of time that presents a vehicle for a period of time that presents a substantial risk to the child's health or safety, shall be guilty of a Class A misdemeanor...
(c) Any parent, guardian or person having custody or control, or providing supervision, of any child under the age of twelve years knowingly leaves such child unsupervised in place of public accommodation or motor vehicle between the hours of eight o'clock p.m. and six o'clock a.m. for a period of time that presents a substantial risk to the child's health or safety, shall be guilty of a Class C felony."

See, it's subjective. Is three minutes alone in a cool, locked car a "substantial risk to the child's health or safety?" I say no. I think the woman on Greenwich Ave basically just left her kid alone for too long, long enough for people to notice and worry. So, she messed up, but you can see how she could easily think she had done no wrong.

I'd never leave my baby alone in the car, because here's how I think: "What if someone ran into my car with my baby in it, and he was trapped? I'd want to be trapped WITH him. Or, what if I fainted in the store, and no one knew I had a baby in the car? What if there is an explosion in the store and I'm knocked out? My baby could overheat in the car." I mean, weirder things have happened, right?

By the way, the Washington Post article is worth a read, but it's really, really depressing. Between 15 and 25 kids die each year when their caregivers accidentally leave them in the car. The biggest thing I got from the article was a) when you are tired and busy, your memory can short circuit and b) to avoid that, leave your purse in the backseat by the carseat so you won't forget your kid. A sleeping kid is a quiet kid, and a busy parent who is not used to taking the kid to daycare might forget he/she has the kid in the car and just go right to work. The article profiles a couple of these devastated people and describes how the scenario can easily happen to a tired, distracted person.

Best Baby Store in Stamford: Bed Bath Beyond

I'm really psyched about Bed Bath and Beyond carrying so much quality baby gear- now I can get the super-safe Britax carseat I want at 20% off since I can use the ubiquitous BBB coupons- but boy would BBB have come in handy oh, about 6 months ago when we started shopping for baby gear!
It would have saved me
a) a couple hellish trips to White Plains/Hartsdale, where Buy Buy Baby and Babies R Us are, and
b) 20% off of my babyseat and strollers. Yeah, I said strollers. You'll see when you have a baby. This wall, which looks really scary to you now, will look like a candy store when you were a child.

I hit the baby section at BBB yesterday and I was impressed. It takes up the entire back section of the store.

Here's a list of cool stuff they have that I have, love, and/or want: all the kickass strollers (city mini jogger, bugaboo cameleon, you name it they have it), Bebe au Lait nursing covers, the ERGObaby carrier (so much better than the Bjorn once the baby can hold his own head up), Swaddleme swaddles (don't get the fleece, too hot- get cotton), Halo sleep sacks, and hideously ugly but useful baby swings. They've got high chairs, pack and plays, medicine, bath stuff, baby-proofing safety stuff... everything except clothing, and there's not much in the way of crib sheets.*

I WILL say, although all this baby stuff is 20% off, it's still worth a trip to Giggle on Greenwich Ave because you cannot beat Giggle's customer service. With all the money you save at BBB, you can afford to splurge on some of Giggle's more unusual items (like a round bath tub baby can sit up in, fun sheets, and cool mobiles).

Here's a pic of the Bebe au Lait nursing covers; BBB has the best selection in the area! I own two because they are so awesome. Just be careful not to get the double fabric one (with eyelets) if you are going to be using it in the summer; it's hot enough under that cover even when you have the single layer!

*You should order crib sheets online from Babies R Us, or hit Giggle in Greenwich for some spectacular ones that cost twice as much but that I find worth it since it has such a prominent place in the nursery. My nursery was basically planned around some orange striped sheets from Giggle, much like the only thing I cared about for my wedding 2 years ago was that I had orange roses. Oh, and go next door to Carter's for adorable, comfortable, affordable baby clothes.

Feeling Unpopular? Have a Baby.

Are you feeling neglected and unpopular? Seriously, have a baby. It will restore your faith in FC humanity. Now, maybe I'm just a particularly cute and charming looking mother, but I- I mean, my baby- get so many loving, admiring glances while we're out. I "wear" him a lot in his sling, so maybe people think he's brand new or something. Really, the sling is so no one can get near him and breathe on him. Plus, I love to have his warm little body close.
In any case, people are ridiculously nice to us. Yesterday in Super Stop and Shop, I was wearing him in his Bjorn (far inferior in comfort to the Moby wrap, but easier to put on), and bending over to take items out of my cart. It was pretty cumbersome. A nice old lady must have thought I was going to drop Baby Q on his head, because she insisted on unloading my cart for me.
The checkout lady and the grocery bagger both smiled and cooed at me- I mean, my baby- and were really sweet, saying hi to us- I mean, him, and asking us- I mean, him- how old we were. (Almost 3 months!)
People, including me, are just suckers for babies. It's really sweet. You have to wonder why we can't be nicer to each other, if we are able to be so lovely with babies!

One of the nice things about a baby is that it forces you to slow down. A trip to the mall and grocery store takes twice as long, because at some point, you have to change a diaper or two (in the car) or feed the baby (which I also do in the car because mine has comfy seats). You just can't rush putting a baby in and out of a carseat, or unloading groceries while wearing a baby. You just have to accept that you are slow as a turtle, and that feels really good to me. It's like I'm living in the South again!

Now, the flip side of being that popular is that if you ARE in a hurry, you have to beat people off with sticks to keep them from talking to you and wanting to look at your baby and asking you how old he is and, of course, telling you to "enjoy every minute." Everyone says that to me. I'd say it's annoying, but it's actually a helpful reminder!